Ingenious Evil!

Today we will take a look at the darkness and the light-Intelligence in all of its uses. That is, the difference between a Genius and a Mad-Genius. That is, I’ll give you some scenarios, and then see if you can figure out the similarity.

Tokyo Subway

Tokyo was attacked some years ago in a subway gassing by members of a fanatical Religious group. It no longer exists, but the plan was remarkable. It was crude, easy to spot and draw attention, and most likely going to fail. But they got away with the attack. The plan was as follows. 5 terrorists would get on Japanese Trains, all heading to the same city. They carried bags filled with newspaper rolls, filled with Saran, which in it’s purest form, a single drop can kill many men. They also carried an umbrella with a speared tip. As they got on the trains, half way through the rides, they laid out their packages. As they left, the stabbed the packages with the tip of the umbrella, and walked out. No one suspected anything until people started dying, and it took Police two hours to figure out what it might have been. It’s amazing. I can’t recall the Death-toll, it wasn’t that high, but the fact of the matter is, these guys walked into a train, off it, and released poison without anyone knowing they had done it until there were deaths. And no one was prepared for it.

9/11

So, a lot of you are going to get offended. But, who would think that that’d be a good plan? We were all shocked and stunned at what happened, but who wouldn’t be? The villains flew right into our backyard and blew us up. Using a plane as a homing missile. Airport security should have caught them. But nope. They just kept on trucking. RIGHT INTO THE WTC AND PENTAGON.

Columbine

Getting onto the school grounds with guns, planting the bombs without anyone noticing it, and then slaughtering everything that twitched. The police were out and ready, but didn’t do anything. It also took a great amount of time and effort securing the weapons and ammunition. They had a specific path through the school. Until they got to the Library, where they started to wander.

The London Bombings

Once again, a whole bunch of people get on busses and subways, and BOOM! All of Europe is up in smoke.

Conclusion:

She Said Yes…To People Who Didn’t Care

The book, ‘She Said Yes’ Misty Bernall is a touching story about a girl who gets shot at Columbine High on the day of the attacks by Eric and Dillon. The story goes that she was asked if she believed in God. She answered yes, and then was gunned down. I’ve never read the book, but I do know a lot about the Columbine School Shooting, and enough to say that anyone who concludes that the gunmen were Anti-Christian Terrorists who went around and killed the believers of god is a total dip-shit. She is, therefore, not a martyr. So when I watch all the little morons making a big deal of it, I get pissed. Want to know why?

Mission: Hunt Them All!

The two boys swept throughout the school, one with a shotgun the other with an automatic firearm. They blew through the school, setting off Pipe-Bombs, hoping the explosion would cause enough panic to cause the kids to run out into the halls. Sometimes it worked. Mostly, they used them to blow down locked doors. They checked almost every room in the school, killing everyone they saw. Their targets? White-caps. The two boys had been put down as freaks – Erik and Dillon, were teased, and tormented, and if you hung with them, the same would happen to you. They were lowest on the social ladder, geeks, freaks, whatever the hell the lowest position is, I don’t pay attention to pop culture. And so, because they were ‘freaks,’ no one willingly became their friend. That’s why people make fun of others; out of their own insecurity. They don’t want to be called what they’re calling others, and so therefore, they laugh at them, and they’re either to afraid of their social status to help, or are heartless assholes. Erik and Dillon did not have this fear, but the consequences still came up. The main group suspect to the torment given to the duo was the jocks. The jocks were called whitecaps at times because almost every one of them wore, you guessed it, a white cap. This made our two crusaders’ main targets easier to find.

Hi, Do You Believe in God?

Now on to the actual premise. The book says she was asked the fatal question. And upon answering it, was shot. Wow, that’s a real testament to the Christians! Sure, she was under pressure, and not sure of what to say, but that was just it; she was unsure of what to say! So she said the truth. Personally, it wouldn’t have mattered. The only reason she was a ‘martyr’ is that she answered the question does she believe in god yes and then was shot. If they were going around and asking everyone that question, and everyone said, ‘No,’ then it would be different. They just asked her that question, and her alone. Does that make her special? Maybe. That’s not the point. The point is, the book seems to make it look like they targeted Christians. Well, considering 75% of the world is Christian, no shit they’re going to kill a lot of Christians. The book focuses on the death of one girl, in a massive killing spree. It does not focus on the fact that she was the only one asked that question, therefore, something had to be different. I’m pretty sure they would have shot her either way, there were just curious as to her Religion. It didn’t matter to them. If it had, they would have asked others. You could say that several of the kids were let go because they respected Eric and Daniel, and that a usual trait of this was not believing in God. Guess what? You’re wrong! It maybe a usual trait, but that did not mean they would have asked someone “Do you believe in God?” To see if they were ‘worthy’ of being killed. They let some people go because those people had shown Eric And Daniel respect.

Reality Check: Plausibility = 0

Also, if she was killed in the Library, where most everyone was shoot and only one person left without getting blasted, HOW DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT SHE SAID?! It took a year or so for anyone to even get close to thinking this. And how did the parents respond? “Our intent was to share Cassie's story in an effort to encourage parents and teenagers. If any of our actions have hurt or offended anyone, we sincerely apologize.” Yes, you brainwashed freak. That makes perfect sense in the context of the fucking question.

Her story could have been a testament in and of itself to Christians without her parents fucking it up for a few extra dollars. It seriously wrenches my heart how they could exploit something so terrible…so maybe it does answer the question, if you think of it in a “You lied.” sense. Glad I didn’t give them my money.

Excuse me?!

Oh, but wait! There is something offensive! Witchcraft is Satanism! That’s right! In the beginning of the book, the girl goes around and hangs out with people who do drugs, and practices Wicca for a short time. She is a troubled child in the book, but OH HOLY SHIT! The author did such a crappy job of writing the book that people have confused a perfectly good faith for Satanism! In fact, Satanism isn’t that bad either! I’m not babbling about it here though. But assuming Satanism is bad, Witchcraft is not Satanism. A Pentacle is not a Pentagram. GET USED TO IT. Also, it makes Gothic people look bad. They’re not bad people! They just have they’re own way of looking at the world! One of the reviews of the book goes thus;

“From reading this book, you will see that goths are not people who wear black and write strange poetry, they are people who speak and write of such horrible things, they can be disturbing to ADULTS. I most certainly WOULD NOT recommed this book to young children, and people who are easily disturbed…When Cassie's school was attacked by two boys (disturbing people like she used to be) armed with guns and bombs…” 

Another interesting thing about this book is that her parents TAKE HER AWAY FROM

her former religion. Religion is none of your business! Her religion caused her to hang with the wrong crowd, but hanging with them doesn’t matter unless you pick up what they do. If your friend smokes weed, you should do something about it. But is it your problem? What I mean is, as long as you don’t pick it up, you don’t have to worry about you smoking pot. Weed-smokers can be good people. They shouldn’t reform her Religion, just her constant maniac threats to kill herself and others.

Conclusion:

I feel very sorry for the families of the Columbine Tragedy, but, as usual, the Catholic Church and its Brainwashed Cronies have once again fucked up something very somber that had very little or nothing at all to do with religion and turn it into some kind of ‘Our faith is under attack!’ religious war. By closing off parts of the story, assuming what happened in cases which real documented proof is unable to be found, you can call anyone a martyr. It really pisses me off. Did you know Al Qaeda wasn’t targeting Christianity? No? Really? Well maybe you should stop watching Fox News, you dumb shit, because all your ever going to get out of that is RELIGIOUS PROPOGANDA. In fact, you’ll get that everywhere else, too! It was America that they hated. Bin Laden saw Americans attacking shrines in the original Iraq War, and became so enraged at the defilement, he thought everyone who was so wicked as to do that must die. That’s how he began Al Qaeda. We’re ‘infidels’ because we don’t know enough to understand that bit of Islamic Culture, which is one of the most important things outside the Pillars of Faith. This obscuring of the truth that we may not even know is the Catholic Church’s weapon to control us. It happened in the Crusades, its happened at WWII. It happened to support (Yes, support!) Slavery, it’s happened in this case. It’s happened in the Iraq War we’re fighting. It’s happened since the Jews first wrote the Old Testament, and goes on to today.

NOTE: As the days go on, I’ll be updating this frequently. I don’t know the whole story (Most of what I know comes from Amazon.com reviews), and I normally like to. But this just pissed me off so much that I got angry and had to type something about it. More later. Bye.

Fatties of the world, UNITE!
 

This week’s article is bound to be offensive, rude, and nobody will like it. But you know what? It’s the truth behind the matter. This week’s article is about weight. From Anorexic to Overweight hulks, I’ll be sharing with you about America’s biggest problem; Weight.

Eating Disorders:

We’ll start with the thing that’s probably going to upset the most people. Teens today, especially girls, love to starve, binge and exercise themselves into conformity. They want to look they’re best, so they throw off pounds by throwing off all eating. It hurts to be called fat. And in today’s teen world, fat is a sin.

Main Reasoning for EDs:

One of the reasons people start on the path of eating disorders is because they’re called “fat” by fellow classmates. It stings and hurts, so they try and burn off a few pounds. When they realize it’s not as easy as riding an exercise bike every once in a while, they start crying and soon decide the only way to fix it is to stop eating entirely. There are other reasons for why it might be done – peer pressure is probably one of them, but in the end, it usually all ends up to social context.

How EDs work:

The person starts to go on the ED and begins to lose weight almost within the first few days. Your body is burning fat to keep alive. It always is, but when you eat, you’re adding fat to that. So you’re replenishing the fat you got rid of.  However, the person doesn’t see that. No matter how thin they get, they still see themselves as fat! So they eat less. Until they get so malnourished they keel over and die, if no one stops it.

Pyron’s View:

Anorexia is very strange. It is both choice and not. There’s one thing I’m certain of. I have very little respect for people who are anorexic and are proud of it. I hate it, I will never do it myself, but there’s one thing anyone who’s anorexic should know what I think when they read this; It is not a choice, but you can overcome it. That is the goal of what the psychologists do when you met them. In the end, they’re just there to help you, it’s up to you to give it up. You’ve been brainwashed, so it’ll be hard, but try, okay? Okay, now I feel sick. Anyways, moving on.

Types of Overweight People (In Pyron’s eye):

Social labels are not good unless you use them to describe. It’s a long story, but even though I don’t like labels, I still have classified certain peoples into groups. I do not judge, however. Anyways, I’ve come across 3 types of generally overweight people.

Family:

These people who are overweight are overweight naturally. They’re big boned, and heavy set, which means they require a little bit more food then the rest of us. There is nothing wrong with these people, and they’re often made fun of because of something they cannot change. It’s encrypted into their gene code, probably from generations of Cake ‘n Bakes or Sicklings.

Cake ‘n Bake:

These are the people I cannot stand. Cake ‘n Bakes generally are overweight because they consume so much, and then sit on the couch. These are the lazy people who eventually get heart problems form being fat, and then say “Why God, why?! Why have you made me overweight?!” when really it was themselvess. And then working out becomes harder, and what weight become harder to burn. To summarize, they bloat themselves up and don’t think they’re responsible, They annoy me so. They always wonder, “I go on diets! I work hard! And then I reach my goal, but I just gain that weight back!” What the morons don’t realize is that what got them fat in the first place is how they ate! So by going back to that, they just gain all the weight back again. They’ll have to find a middle ground. These are the people who usually remind us obesity is a disease and it’s too hard to change.

Sicklings:

Though that is a very…rude term, it’s the one I like best. These are the people who actually have obesity problems. These are the people who, no matter how hard the try, cannot stop eating and cannot lose weight. Obesity is a disease. It’s proven. However, only the sicklings truly have it. The Cake ‘n Bakes often say, “It’s unavoidable! I’m diseased!” and would like you-and themselves-to think they have it, but the truth is it’s hard to tell the difference between the two.

Social Weight:

I hate today’s society. People are encouraged to be stupid, they put their minds on unavoidable goals, and they always over due everything. They’re afraid. Of what? Well, a lot of things. But the greatest nightmare of all is social status. If someone falls behind, they are doomed to be bombarded with rock chunks until the next position change, when they can move away. It’s almost scary how America soon became judged by it’s weight by whatever imaginary being watches us all. So much so, that if you’re not a regular weight – on contraire, about 100 lbs below it – you are forever doomed to languish as a social outcast. Does anyone else here get sick from just reading that? Sure, it ok to have SOME Peer Pressure when trying to lost weight, but when being regular weight is considered bad, and when people are made fun of for their weight, it really makes me sick.

This may have sounded hypocritical. So let me clear it up. Sicklings and Family Overweights have my regards, and I’d love to help them lose weight in whatever way I could. Cake ‘n Bakes can all go burn in the bonfire I have in my backyard. And it’s a sad place when we start making fun of people for looks. But that is for another article.

Well that concludes today’s article. Be sure to make sure you send me lots of comments and E-mails, so I can kick your ass!

LONDON BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN…

What, you haven’t heard? London. England was attacked by several bombs on July 7. The recent attack on London has led to a lot of speculation, and even more finger pointing. Well, I’m not going to pick all the players, but I will talk about one.

Um…It was France!!

Where my family’s-or, rather, those of my brothers-finger seems to point is to France. Mind you, this is within the first few hours (I started this article at 11:43, EST, a couple of hours after the bombing).

The Case:

Now some of you look at me and think, “France!? Why would they have done it?” Well, my brother (We’ll call him Snipe) made this case;
 “The French really don’t like Europe or America. And then they lose they’re Olympic bid. It’s too much of a coincidence.”
He then added, “Hopefully it is France and America will side with Europe and we can take out the bastards!”
In addition, France also did not join the EU when offered.

My two brothers are very, very, very, judgmental of people. Just the night before, me, Snipe, my other brother, and Snipe had been talking to me about diversity. It was an interesting way, how they looked at it. (PLEASE NOTE! Use of the N word, C words, and others used ahead.)
 “I mean, Caucasians, Niggers, Artics, and Chinks people are like, different types of humanoid species. White people are like, normal, Niggers are stronger but dumber, Chinks are shorter and weaker but are smarter, and Artic people are more creative, but are slow.”

As you can imagine, I really don’t like any of this. Though as I sat there, I realized a bit of truth to what they said. Just as women are smarter then men, but men is stronger, it generally held true. There were cases of other things and other people, but mainly, that’s the way it was. After contemplating the thought, I realized Snipe almost had a point in what he said, even if I didn’t agree with it. Later I heard about the bombings, and decided to write this article. Naturally, my brother’s stupidity was a most. He was either doing it to piss me off because he knew I liked the French, or because he believed it. Either way, it’s extremely sad.

FIVE REASONS IT WASN’T FRANCE:

I. France may have lost the Olympics, but I don’t think they’d bomb a city over it.
II. If France wanted to bomb anywhere, they’d bomb America, not Europe.
III. France is mainly a peace loving nation. It’d be against them to do this.

IV. I’m pretty sure French Officials have better things to do then plan a bombing.

V. France is part of the UN. If it was them, they would be ejected. NOT a good thing. And if France did it to get out of the UN, they could have just resigned.

As you can see, even you though probably know it wasn’t the French, I do believe I just made it clear that it was not, and could not have been them.

I FART IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION! (Why Do Americans Hate the French?)

Why do we hate the French? I have, in my life, seen no good reason for America hating the French and vice versa.

VIVA LA REVOLUTION!

Is it because we started the French Revolution? What? It’s true! American ideals of Liberty and Equality spread to France because of the American Revolution, a war in which these rights played a key roll in the happenings. To support the American war effort, King Louis XVI bled France nearly dry of money and supplies. As you can imagine, this totally destroyed the economy of France. A lot of people became upset, so King Louis XVI became more tyrannical to control them, and soon, both he and his wife were guillotined! Maybe we never appropriately thanked and consoled them for their help in the Revolution.

The Statue of Paris.

Maybe it was Ms. Liberty? Yes, believe it or not you moronic boobs, France made The Statue of Liberty, and gave it to us as a gift. Well, America hated her, and they really didn’t care much about it, but they kept her anyways. However, when they found out that immigrants who saw the Statue while heading towards Ellis Island saw it as a sign of freedom and liberty, America exploited. Soon, it became a symbol of America and the American Nation. The French Builders and designers were probably proud for the first few moments, but soon realized that America never really appreciated the gift for it being a gift.

How Insulting!

Who knows. Maybe it’s because we made fun of the French (like we do everyone else) and they took it more offensively. In the end, they only thing that can honestly be said is that there is tension between America and France. And if I can’t even place my finger on why, then I’m pretty sure it’s useless.

The Perfect Storm

Personally, I think it’s a combination of all these. Because they both kept through salt in each others wounds, and things that didn’t help the American/French Relationships occurred in the right place at the wrong time, it lead to the destruction of that relationship. Americans cuss out and make fun of the French, proclaiming them as the weakest, stupidest and most stuck-up people around, while the French do the same to the Americans.

Who REALLY did it?

Well, my guess is Al Qaeda. The terrorist group claimed responsibility for the attacks on a website. Though British authorities are still unsure of weather they’re telling the truth. Personally, I think it was them, but we don’t know who it was yet, and I’m not pointing fingers until we know who it is.

Conclusion:

Quite simply to sum it up, I’ll say as Mel Gibson once said in The Patriot; ‘Trust the French.’ Honestly, it’s the only way to ever get along with France. I don’t understand the hatred for France, and people keep pointing the fingers at each other, that will never help it.

NOTE: The quotes located within the article are not specific word for word quotes. I have a terrible memory, so I tried to type down what I could remember. The quotes are not censored other then this manor, because by censoring you’re taking away the fullness of what something should be. The phrases located herein would not be the phrases located herein if I censored it. If you’re going to send me E-mails about this, I gave you fair warning. Don’t bitch to me, bitch at my brothers.

CHAIN MAIL:

The Introduction:
Okay. Do you really want to see how stupid chain mail is? Well, if you read on, you're going to.
The following is a bulletin I received via Myspace. After you're done reading it, if you're too stupid to find how actually made up it is, I will describe so. I'm almost dead certain this chain mail was written as a joke.

By the way, this does not count as a reposting because I'm not spreading the chain on. I'm taking the letter and reviewing it, looking at it and then putting it up for people to see what I had to say. And unless you read it before, you would never understand my comments, so it is mandatory that I put it here, and thus it nulls the chain. You will not be cursed by this letter if you read it here, unless you yourself decide to pass it on.

The Letter:
YOU BETTER REPOST THIS! ITS ALL TRUE!!! ALL OF IT!!! IT JUST HAPPENED!!!

Sexyma43254:hey, i'll give you a scat job if you let me in

buFfdUDe1818:what, who are you?
Sexyma43254:My name is Samantha clit, and this is Mike Hurff, right?

buFfdUDe1818:Yeah, I am eating spaghetti

Sexyma43254:Oh, well i think your hot and i want to see you tonight.

buFfdUDe1818:I don't even know you

Sexyma43254:but i know you

buFfdUDe1818:oh...well you aren't going to sneek through my window then bladerape me, then skin me alive, then hang my remains, then eat them are you?

Sexyma43254:Oh...no...well...no...just make sure you sleep in your little brothers room and go to the window when you hear a knock...and don't have a weapon near you.

buFfdUDe1818:Alright...ill make sure im just in boxers and im as vulnerable as possible.

Sexyma43254:Oh, and make sure your brother is vulnerable too...and dont wake him up if you are disturbed by anything.
 
buFfdUDe1818:Alright.
 

That night, Mike went into his brother's room and slept with him(occasionaly rubbing his genitalia against his brother's soft and velvety anus). But he awoke due to a tap at a window that a preverted/psychotic girl could fit through. He got up and leaned foward while putting his hands behind his back and walked to the window....he opened the window and leaned over the sill as far as he could to see if anyone was there...nothing...just some branches and a squirrel. He turned around and saw his brother bleeding through his ears and mouth...Mike went to check it out...but when he got there he realized his brother had stopped breathing! He then saw a hand coming out of his closet door. He didn't think twice about not telling his parents or grabbing a weapon. instead he decided to be smart and go open the closet door. And suprisingly there was a sick girl there...she stood 4'11 and had no mouth. her eyes were baby blue and she had blood soaked brown hair. Then she grabbed mike by the neck...threw him on the ground and bladeraped him, then skinned him alive, hung his remains and ate them.

PART 2

The next day the boys little sister Megan who was only 5 went into her little brothers room only to find them both dead. She screamed and her parents ran in....they were devestated and cried for 3 days straight...they died from water loss and the little girl was left parentless...so she went and lived with a foster home...she went on her new families computer and got an IM....

YoIminHell69:Hey lil sis

Heyimurlilsis1314:Hoo is dis?

YoIminHell69:its your brother.

Heyimurlilsis1314:I dont have a brother

YoIminHell69:yes you do, you have two...remember we were just killed a few days ago.

Heyimurlilsis1314:no...i don't...
YoIminHell69:...

Heyimurlilsis1314:wait, yes i do.

YoIminHell69:good good

Heyimurlilsis1314:wait, aren't you dead?

YoIminHell69:yeah, hell has computers

Heyimurlilsis1314:but why are you in hell?

YoIminHell69:i kinda touched my lil bro that night...but thats not the point.

Heyimurlilsis1314:oh so what do you want?

YoIminHell69:well i need you to go kill anyone who doesnt pass on my murder story after they read it.

Heyimurlilsis1314:okay...i'll do that...i have infinite transportation to everywhere in america and some parts of europe.

YoIminHell69:umm...it'd work better if you killed yourself...then you could run around everywhere murdering people who dont pass on this chain letter and the government would NEVER get involved with the mysterious deaths stemming from passed on internet stories.

Heyimurlilsis1314:So you want me to enforce those chainletters that take up all the space on blog sites like myspace,livejournal,xanga and all other email systems.

YoIminHell69:yeah...that would be sweet....im sure when you die you will get an instant psychic connection to everyone's computer and know who read what, when.

Heyimurlilsis1314:oh, yeah, i probably will...awesome...ill go kill myself now.

Later that night the girl killed herself and became an all powerful and almost omnipresent being...Megan now spends her days bladeraping,skinning,hanging,and eating people who don't pass on this chain letter.

Watch out...cause if you dont pass this on in 35 seconds you will be Bladeraped, skinned, hung, then eaten by megan...who is now ugly and deformed looking because she is dead and vengeful.

GOOD LUCK(because it takes luck to repost a fucking bulletin or forward an email)

The FUN:
This is a examination of the above chain, with each new topic in  bold so you can jump to the topics you think are funniest. It will go in order of how the events unfolded, and then the things that echoed throughout the entire story.

Person 1: You're going to DIE! Person 2: Oh, okay:
If this story is real, the jackass deserved to die. He met some random girl online, who specifically told him "No weapons, be defenseless as possible! Oh no, I'm not going to come in and kill you!" I'm one horny mother fucker, and if I wasn't currently taken and offered that opportunity by some random person who just popped up on the internet, I'd say hell no, and block their sorry ass.

Person 1: You’re going to DIE! Person 2: Oh, Okay Part II:

‘He knew better then to close the closet door when his brother got killed?’ How the hell is that smart? This guy, if he really did exist, got what was coming to him. His brother is bleeding through the mouth and ears, he doesn’t even go tell his parents, he just sits there and leaves him? And he ‘KNEW BETTER?!’ Sure he may have wanted a scat job, but if someone I knew died like that, I’d run like hell. Yes I do actually get scared. And then later, he expects me to be sorry for him? I’m sorry, the number you have reached, 797-667-4625[*], DOESN’T GIVE A SHIT. Please hang up and bother someone else.

Cry Me a River, Build me a Bridge, and Get Over It:
The parents are said to have cried themselves to death. That is possible, I guess, but seriously. The people may have been emotionally frail, but I don't think anyone is so emotionally frail that they'll cry for three days, non stop, so much that they dye. There tears would not kill them, so much as the fact they never got up to get a drink of water. Also, they'd probably get a disease from the urine and shit (Shit is actually the equivalent to the word urine) in their pants.

Speedy Foster Home Delivery! New parents in 30 minutes or less!:

When a child’s parents die, if it has no family or legal guardians to go to, the child is generally put into an orphanage until someone decides to adopt it. However, either way the parents would have to prove that they can handle it to the courts, who would be the best choice, etc. etc., which involves filling out paperwork, sentiments, pledges, testing and going to court. And as well all know the Judiciary System moves so slow I could walk around the world and comeback, and the case would still be going on. It doesn’t take a ‘few days.’ I’m not going to bother to find the average time, but I know it’s not ‘a few days.’

Amnesia:

Well, ignoring the fact that Megan would have never been at the foster parents’ home in this time, the author probably wants us to guess it’s been almost a week after the death of her family. And she’s already forgotten about it? I remember when my grandpa passed away when I was about that age, I didn’t stop thinking about it for a month. I’ve never ever had to be reminded that he died, though it has gone to the back of my mind. Her new family couldn’t have made her forget her brothers and parents that fast. My guess is that the author used this as a way of showing us that it was real, by adding human emotions to it.

Protesters rally! Hell needs more technology!:
Hell has computers!? When did this happen? How come Heaven doesn't have them? And if Hell and Heaven really do, how come my dead girlfriend hasn't IMed me? Is it special access only? What do you have to do to get access to the computers in Heaven and Hell? How come Satan will even LET the boy talk to his sister? I mean he wants people to know about his death, Keyword, WANTS. Hell does not give you what you want unless it's too much of it, and they certainly would not let you communicate to the mortal world.

Stupidity! Everywhere you want to be!:
The story says the girl is 5. And she has instant transportation to everywhere in the US and some places in Europe? WHAT?! Is that because of her foster parents? Or will they just let her get up and go? If it’s instant will they have time to pack? Seriously, I can’t even behind to describe how stupid this is.

Person 1: You're going to DIE! Person 2: Oh okay Part III:
Does anyone find it funny how lightly the girl takes suicide? She just goes and kills herself at her brother’s command. The guy may not have even been her brother, but like everyone else in the story, she’s a total moron and thinks, ‘Why find out if it's really my brother? I’ll just die, and when I do, expect everyone to feel bad for me and my brother, an  then go and kill Pyron because she read this and did not repost it, and made a total mockery of it.’ People do commit suicide, but I don't think a retarded kid would go kill themselves because someone on the internet told them to. This shows, along with many other things, the low level of intelligence of the girl, even though she can speak perfect English. Thus she is no longer a threat to me or anyone with a quarter of a brain. Yes, she was 5 years old, but if she was on the computer, her parents should have been watching her. Personally, I don't even think you should get AIM service until you're 10 years old, because then you're old enough to understand who you're talking to. But even so, a 5-year-old should know NOT to kill herself, especially because someone told her to. Didn't either of her parents teach her that?

The Government Acts!:
The letter says the government dare not get involved with deaths caused by chain letters. Well, guess what? All deaths are investigated. The police try to find the killers the best they can. All deaths are recorded and put into files and records, even mysterious deaths. The government records everything, and if chain mails really did kill, they would be banned. The Government could be covering it up, but then the conspiracy theorists would be on to it.

Call me for your free reading!:
The one line in here that had me convinced this was a all a joke was the line, "...im sure when you die you will get an instant psychic connection to everyone's computer..." What is this, Nightmare on Elm Street? Do all ghosts get special connections to computers? Or is it just Megan because her brother said so? Or perhaps you have a choice when you become a ghost? You can either choose to be intangible, able to possess people, and be able to go invisible, or have a mental connection with computers. I mean come on, it's so stupid. I believe in the metaphysic, but I don't ever think a ghost would bother with dealing with chain mail.

OH NO! MEGAN'S GOING TO...wait, what?:
According to the title, it just happened, so Megan is still 5 years old, how the hell could she even know what sex is, and even how to blade rape? I suppose one could argue that in the afterlife you gain all knowledge of the world, but if Megan's a ghost, she didn't go to the afterlife. You could say you gain that knowledge on death, but as any paranormal investigator will tell you, some ghosts are smart, some are dumb. Some are violent, others are peaceful. They'd all act the same way with endless knowledge. So the only logical explanation is that she was molested as a child. Probably by her brother, because you don't go to hell for a one time offense. Actually, now it makes sense that she killed herself because he asked. I mean, they must have bonded real well. There's nothing like a fun, brother-sister game of 'lick the stick' under the covers.

My name is...My name is...My name is...Very stupid:
heyimursis? yoiminhell? Samantha Clit? I hope the names were changed to protect the innocent-or, better stated, the guilty. The twit who wrought this could have found a few better SN names and chosen slightly better (I know they’re AIM SNs, dipshits).

The Guide to Extensive English Language for the 5-Year-Old:
Infinite? Enforce? How the hell does a 5 year old know those words? I had an extensive vocabulary as a 5-year-old, and I still have an extensive vocabulary today, but the most complicated word I could say was eject, which was written on the seatbelt holders. Or maybe it could have been diarrhea. Either way, I did not know the words infinite and enforce, or many words like that. And no five-year old can English like that little twerp did, which again proves the conversations were edited at the very least.

Conclusion:
Quite simply, the majority of Americans are probably going to believe this letter if and when they get it. I was able to tell that this was a load of shit the first few seconds after I finished it, but the average American can no longer seem to find their brain stem.
I'll add more later. For now, I've made an appropriate mockery of this letter. If you have any comments, questions, or would like to debate this with me, E-mail me.